Sometimes it can feel really good to know something, be able to answer someone’s question, provide information, to offer an informed opinion. Today at work I was laughing with a colleague about what I was going to do over the next few days when she’s on vacation and I am the go-to person for questions or issues that arise concerning the project I’ve been working with her on for the past six months. She was emailing our various contacts to let them know to address their questions to me.
“Be sure to let them know I don’t know anything,” I called to her when she told me what she was doing. “Set their expectations very low!”
We both laughed and she tsk’ed at me, reminding me that I now know a lot about the project, a lot more than I did going in, that’s for sure.
When I first started doing contract work with this nonprofit organization I knew virtually nothing about the industry: affordable housing for seniors. The work deals with millions of dollars in loans and government contracts, construction and building designs, mortgages and financing. It is an entirely different world from where I’ve spent my career, with a language all its own. Very early on in my time there I felt almost embarrassingly ignorant. And yet, the three or four principal coworkers with whom I interact most closely were incredibly patient with my lack of understanding, giving me just enough information to get me started, then with a great deal of trust and confidence that I didn’t have myself, turned me loose to do the work, assuming I would learn as I went along. And darned if I didn’t.
Now I can hardly claim to be an expert in affordable housing, but over the course of the months since I began working for this organization, I can say that I’ve become more expert in a few of the processes that a property needs to go through in order to meet certain government programs. I’ve put together applications full of hundreds (perhaps thousands) of pages of documents, most of which are written in or contain that odd language I mentioned earlier. I was relieved to learn that even the folks I work with who have been working in the field for many years are often baffled by the various vagaries and inconsistencies of government rules and programs.
Over the past weeks I’ve worked steadily with growing confidence that I actually know a thing or two about this stuff I’ve been muddling through since February. It’s a very good feeling, too, to know that I can learn new things and by working hard can contribute pretty much anywhere I’m placed, no matter how alien the work might be to what I know how to do. This is an important skill for someone who is job hunting to have. Now if I can just convince people to give me a chance to show what I can do, I’m sure to wow them.
I’m grateful tonight to have a really good mind. There have been times in the midst of these months of unemployment when self doubt and bruised self esteem have had me all but convinced that I have no skills or competencies to offer to anyone. But that simply isn’t true, and if I need evidence, I need look no further than the work I’ve done over the past six months, learning and contributing to a field I knew little to nothing about. I have skills, gifts, and experiences to share with whomever might choose to hire me, whether it’s an area I’ve worked in before or not. All I really need is the opportunity to show what I’m capable of and what I’m made of. It definitely feels good to know something, and it feels really good to know a lot of somethings! I’m grateful to recognize that for the gift that it s.
