Sometimes simple gratitude is as much as I have energy for; that is somewhat true tonight. This morning I was cranky and low energy. I had a hard time getting myself going. It didn’t help that it was cold and gray and rainy. I wasn’t hard on myself about any of this, after all, Mama did say there’d be days like this. And mama was right. It’s a good thing I have so many good people in my life to whom I can turn for inspiration. I don’t necessarily have to speak to or interact with them; sometimes thinking about them is enough to lighten my mood. My sister Ruth is one of those people, and I have a small number of friends and relations who fall into that category. I am so grateful to have them in my life and particularly appreciative to be living close to my sisters (I know, I’ve mentioned that before. And, it’s still true.)
My restlessness this morning no doubt has directly related to my lack of settledness in my own space. Tomorrow when the movers come and deposit all my “stuff” in various rooms in my house I’ll then be dealing with another issue–boxes and paraphernalia will be everywhere: chaos will rule. One one hand, I’ve been missing my bed and my possessions and my favorite coffee mug, on the other the mass confusion of having boxes and furniture and miscellaneous things like barbecue grills piled into rooms in and around my house is making me shudder just thinking about it. Still, I’ll be glad to be surrounded by my stuff even if it is chaotic.
I have an early start tomorrow morning and I am nodding off at the keyboard. That too makes me smile a little bit. I am still adjusting to time differences and such, I think my body clock is all out of whack and I am trying to figure out how to manage things like blog writing and bed time. Much of this will be helped when I am in my own space surrounded by my stuff, though I will be making many adjustments over the next several weeks. As I become accustomed to my new routine can begin making micro-adjustments and fine tune my schedule. I suspect this will take a little while.
Through it all, patience with myself and the circumstances will be key. One does not trek 2800 miles across the country to a new place, new job, new territories to navigate without having a few bumps in the road, the occasional hiccup and at least one good breakdown (for which I am overdue, I might add.) All such transitions require that we be incredibly gentle and compassionate with ourselves as well as those around us. I hope I can manage that along with all the other things I’ll be handling. It’s good to know that I have a support system a few minutes drive away or seconds away via phone. I can scarcely imagine navigating this brave new world without the steady presence of family. They are the net of support beneath me that allows me to swing out there and reach for my what’s next. They are there, the safe place to land if I should lose my grip and fall. I am exceedingly grateful for that.
Tonight as I prepare to lay my head down and rest, I offer prayers and thanks to my sister Sandy and her husband Al for providing a place for Honor and me to exhale and relax while we waited for my belongings to come from California. And for my sister Ruth and her family for her support throughout the entire process of relocating from California–helping me find the house I will be inhabiting for the next 12 months at least, feeding me many meals, and keeping me encouraged when I got down or scared or just plain cranky.
May they be peaceful and happy. May they be safe and protected from harm. May they be healthy and strong in body, mind and spirite. May they live with joy, ease, and wellbeing. May their generosity and good fortune be magnified and returned to them. May God bless and keep them. May it be so for us all!
