Every weekday evening at the end of the workday, I take the five-seven minute walk to my car, each step pumping myself up to undertake the evening commute. On Monday and Tuesday of this week it was an uncharacteristically short 55 minutes. On Wednesday it was back to an hour and 38 minutes. So tonight when I checked the route on Google maps it told me the trip was going to take one hour and 28 minutes, which is around what it normally takes these days. Sighing, I walked to my car hauling my backpack and lugging a box. I went through my pre-commute rituals then headed down the street toward the interstate.
I had been on I66 East for about a half mile when I saw it: an enormous, round, peach-colored orb of light hovering just above the roadway off in the distance. What was that? Oh my god, it’s the moon. Okay, you can call me a nerd, a romantic, a literal lunatic, but I love the moon (and the planets and the stars…) And for that brief stretch of the commute I was totally mesmerized, not thinking about how tired I was, about any lingering thoughts leftover from the workday, or the long stretch of red taillights I saw ahead of me. For just those few moments it was me and the the rising moon. I once again found myself wondering why it’s always seems so huge when it’s first rising and why it’s sometimes a deep orange or peach or some variation of red, then it becomes that rich milky whitish color we’re used to seeing. How does it do that?
I am grateful not simply for the beauty of the moon, I’m grateful for the wonder.
This morning on my commute in to work I was listening to the radio so I could get a sense of what the traffic would be like further up on the beltway–part of my morning commuting ritual. As I was waiting for the “traffic on the 8s” to come on I was listening to the morning national news roundup. I only half listen to the news sometimes, not wanting any major glumness to start my day off with negativity (this was particularly true in the weeks leading up to the national elections.) The newsperson started in on a story about a person who “captured” a picture of a New York City police officer. I was waiting for the reporter to say it was a picture of the officer beating a defenseless person or harassing someone or other reprehensible behavior. I braced myself for the bad news. It didn’t come. It turns out that the person captured a picture of the officer bending down to help a homeless man put on a new pair of boots that the officer had just bought for him. It seems the cop had noticed that the man had blisters and sores on his feet and, aware that it was also freezing cold in the city had decided to go into his own pocket and buy the homeless man the new pair of boots.
I literally gasped at the completely unexpected “punch line” of the story, my eyes immediately filling with tears. I had done a complete 180 degree shift so fast that I was totally discombobulated by it. It took me a few moments to catch my breath and gather my wits that had been scattered throughout the inside of my car. I didn’t totally take leave of my senses and I was very much in control of my vehicle, but my heart had swelled almost to bursting. I’m not sure how many times I said, “Oh God,” before I finally recollected myself and got back to the business of transporting myself to work. I was not simply grateful for the story or the kindness of the officer, I am grateful for the wonder of it.
Every morning as I am concluding my daily journal writing, I write out some of the time honored well-wishes of Buddhist lovingkindness meditation: may I be filled with lovingkindness, may I be peaceful and happy, may I be safe and protected, may I be healthy and strong in my body, mind and spirit, may I live with joy, ease, and wellbeing. I often add: may I be filled with compassion. And I extend those wishes out to all my family and friends, to my acquaintances and people with whom I have difficulties, and ultimately to everyone everywhere. I try to live as best I can in a space of openness to the possibilities, to open my hands to let go of what I need to let go of and free my hands and arms to “let come” to embrace the life around me. Whether it’s a incredibly generous act of care and kindness between two unlikely people or the awesome, spellbinding beauty of a near perfect full moon, I am grateful for the wonder that is available and accessible all around me.
I don’t experience the sense of wonder every day; in some ways I wish I did, though I’m not sure my heart could stand it. Nevertheless, I am grateful to have the experience of it from time to time. So, so grateful. May our lives be filled with wonder and may we have the awareness to experience that which is all around us. So be it!
