Tonight I celebrate the birth of my son who incarnated on the planet 25 years ago today (August 18). I am grateful for his life, for who he is, for the many things he’s taught me–directly and indirectly–since he was born. I’ve written about him a number of times over the two and a half years that I’ve been writing this blog, including a post I wrote on his birthday two years ago (Day 50). I am celebrating who he is and who he’s becoming, at least as best I can tell about that. We can really only experience who we perceive people to be, and that in large part based on external, observable things. But as someone who watched him grow since the day he emerged from me, I have a pretty decent perspective, at least on his early years.
When I consider the thought that he is 25 years old, I keep hearing strains of the song, “Sunrise, Sunset” from Fiddler on the Roof that speaks to the passage of time, particularly as we watch our children grow. Where indeed does the time go?
I had hoped to write a beautiful tribute to my son this evening, but my words fail me. Tonight I will simply repeat that I am proud of my son. I have watched him persevere through challenging times and learn to stand strongly on his own two feet. He continues to live life on his own terms, even if those terms are different from those I would have wished for or ordered for him. There are so many things I wished for him as I held him in my arms for the first time all those years ago; some of them have come to pass and some have not. I sent him a letter for his birthday detailing the things I am proud of and the things I still hope for him. Mostly I just want him to be happy and to feel like he’s living the life he wants for himself. I know he’s not there yet, but he’s making progress in that direction.
I am grateful for these first 25 years of my sons life and am hopeful that his next 25 will be rich and full and wonderful. Tomorrow is not promised to us, and yet this does not prevent me from hoping for all good things to come to those I love. Tonight as I wind down toward sleep I will offer prayers of gratitude as well as those hopes and wishes mothers have for their sons. I will offer well wishes for peace and happiness, safety and protection from harm, health and strength in body, mind, and spirit, and for joy, ease and wellbeing to be part of his life. And I will pray that the movement he’s made from being a funny, headstrong, intelligent, stubborn, friendly, loyal young boy into a strong, honorable, funny, headstrong, outgoing young man continues to deepen and mature. And I will pray for a deepening of his own sense of generosity, compassion, and of course gratitude for the blessings in his life. May it all be so!
