Today I am once again grateful to have such wonderful people in my life–from my siblings, children, family and friends to the people I volunteer with at the Berkeley Food Pantry, to the wonderful community at East Bay Meditation Center, to my therapist, doctor and other professionals to whom I entrust my health and wellbeing–I am surrounded by some pretty terrific people. Over the past couple of days I’ve reached out and asked for help from a number of folks–mostly asking for prayers about an upcoming situation we’re facing. And as has happened many times throughout this year, when I’ve reached out, people have responded, sending encouraging e-mails, offering helpful suggestions, and extending love and support in many wonderful ways.
When I think about some of the people in my life from long ago, I realize that there are some whom I haven’t seen or spoken to on the phone for many years. Contact with them has been via e-mail mostly, sometimes as infrequently as once per year. But I know without a doubt that I could pick up the phone and call some of them today and if I needed help with something they would not hesitate to do it. Likewise, if they called me and asked a favor, something that was in my power to do, I would do it. I got to thinking about what it takes to develop and cultivate relationships with people that result in that kind of connection. I’m not sure I can articulate it; but I know there’s a quality in the ways that we interact with the people around us that over time can foster a deep level of trust, mutual respect, love, loyalty and other important elements of relationship. I am grateful for the relationships I have where these elements have developed and matured.
I’m not sure where we learn the skills to create friendships and develop deep connections with others. For those of us who are introverted or shy, it can sometimes take us a really long time to figure out how to befriend someone. I learned how to have an open and giving and loving heart from my mother and other members of my family. I watched and learned how to treat people with respect and honor, kindness and compassion, openness and honesty. And while I haven’t always walked it out perfectly, I have done my best and been rewarded with many wonderful friends and colleagues. I value them and try not to take them for granted.
Thinking about this put me in mind of the old James Taylor song, Shower the People in which he sings “shower the people you love with love, show them the way that you feel…” Expressing love, kind of like expressing gratitude, is something I can do every day, several times a day. Now I’m not going to run up to everyone in my life and verbally express love for each of them. It’s about how we demonstrate our feelings for and about the people around us that allow them to experience our appreciation and love for them. I plan on being much more intentional in the days and weeks ahead to “shower” various people in my life with love; and for those whom I am just getting to know, I can at least shower them with appreciation for who they are. What a wonderful gift to give one another!
So many good people in my life. I am filled with gratitude for each and every one of them.
© M. T. Chamblee, 2011
