Tonight I am grateful to be living within 15 minutes of each of my sisters. I have spent time every day with my sisters Ruth and Sandy, and as soon as my sister Michaele returns from traveling I plan on spending time with her too. Of course I have to keep reminding myself that I don’t have to squeeze everything into a few days with them–this is not Christmas where I see them for a day or two or a few hours here or there before I jump back on the plane and head back to California. Now I live here, a short drive away. I am still wrapping my mind around this fact. I have been getting down the route between my sister Sandy’s house (where I’m staying until my belongings arrive from California) and my house and between Sandy’s house and Ruth’s house. Next I need to get from my house to Ruth’s house and from my house to Michaele’s house and I’ll have completed the family circuit.
The other major route to get down is the one to my new job. It will be a long commute–over 25 miles each way. I have the option of taking the subway, but for starters I’m going to drive to see just how bad the traffic is. When I was in California I had a 23.5 mile commute that took me about 40 minutes in and about 60 minutes home. We’ll see how this one goes. I don’t start work for another week, so this week I plan to take a “practice” drive from my house to workplace. I’ll leave during rush hour at the time I will normally leave for work–probably around 7 a.m.–and see how long it takes me. These are the kind of things I’m thinking about at the moment. Once my job starts, I’ll have a whole new set of things to focus on.
This morning I woke a little anxious, though nothing like what I experienced throughout many months of uncertainty. I did not feel that adrenalized fire in my heart and arms and my stomach wasn’t knotted. I wondered if I’d made a good decision in choosing to live closer to my family and have a longer commute to work than living closer to work but farther away from my sisters. But the more I thought about it over the course of the day, I am confident that I made the decision that is best for me right now. It will play out in the days to come, and I’m sure I’ll have days when the long commute is wearying and irritating. But I’m confident that those times will be far overshadowed by the days when I can pop in over at one or another of my sisters’ houses just to hang out or go get coffee or spend some time working on some yard or house project with one of them.
I expect I’ll have more anxious days in the weeks ahead as I get into the flow of my new job, the commute, living in a new place, navigating my way around, etc. I still have a few financial challenges–leftovers from 18 months of unemployment–and a few things I need to work out before I can fully exhale, but I am grateful to be well on the road toward reestablishing a sense of equilibrium that has been missing for quite some time. I know that being able to hang out with my sisters is a major component of the healing process that I’m undergoing. I am grateful for being close by and having the opportunity to connect with them on a regular basis. It will no doubt be a gift that keeps on giving, and I am delighted.
