It took me one hour and 48 minutes to get home from work this evening. When I looked at my navigator and it said it would take 1:53, I grumbled, “No way!” and then the GPS wouldn’t map out alternate routes for me like it usually did. And then sometimes the travel time function of the navigation system is wrong. Today, it wasn’t. I was alright at first, but after about the 1:26 mark I had pretty well had it. But what does “pretty well had it” mean when you the navigation system still says 30 minutes to go? So I tried to listen to my audiobook and not yell at the top of my lungs as I sometimes do when I am tired and cranky and simply want to get home and have my dinner. By the time I pulled into my driveway after 7 p.m. I was cursing and swearing and saying words that would horrify my legions of adoring fans.
When I got to the door of my house, I slowed myself down and exhaled. I knew that when I opened the door, my four-legged friend would be there to greet me and that she deserved a loving greeting from me, especially since I could pretty well guarantee one from her. So I shook off my tiredness, my extreme annoyance, and the serious need for a bathroom break, and stepped in and greeted my friend. She jumped up on me, whining and I put down my book bag and rubbed her belly and said sweet things to her. I took her out to do her business before I took care of my own, and exhaled a little more as I walked her around the yard. I am grateful for the shift of energy that I made just before I walked into the house, grateful to have shown restraint, reminding myself that Honor was not responsible for the long, irritating commute home and so did not deserve any ill temper I might have shown her when I got home.
Mama said there’ll be days like this, after all. But the truth is, the vast majority of the day was fine, good even. So why would I let those last two hours from the time I was shutting down my computer at work until the time I turned the key in the lock dictate what my evening was going to be like? Honor gave me the reason I needed to shift my energy tonight and I am once again grateful for her presence. Although I did manage to recover a moderate sense of equanimity upon my arrival home, I am still pretty tired and not as upbeat as I’d like to be. Nevertheless, I am grateful to be home, safe and sound and sharing a little piece of my world with you this evening.
I am going to sign off and go play my guitar for a little while. Music–particularly when I’m playing–has a way of transforming what’s happening around me, of allowing me to connect with a deeper place, of helping me to let go. For all that, and for so much more that I am unable to utter tonight, I am exceedingly grateful. May all beings be free from suffering and the causes of suffering. May we be happy and peaceful. May we be safe and protected from harm. May we be healthy and strong in body, mind, and spirit. May we live with joy, ease, and wellbeing. May it be so for us all!
