Lessons in Gratitude Day 664

I am one tired person. I was up late last night and woke at my usual time this morning. I got home after 7 p.m. after a one hour and 40 minute drive home. I walked then fed the dog, heated up leftovers and ate in front of the news which I had to rewind to watch in its entirety. Then I simply vegetated, reading several Facebook posts. It has been one of those evenings when I’d like to complain and say things like, “Mama said there’ll be days like this…” But the truth is this hasn’t been a bad day–a long, tiring day, but overall a decent day.

I think sometimes I carry more weight (“burdens”) over the course of the day than I realize. Besides the actual work itself, which upon reflection really isn’t difficult, particularly when compared to more complex or physically or mentally challenging tasks. But when you layer onto it other environmental factors that add extra stress or pressure, then it feels that much heavier and makes the work day feel twice as long or the tasks much more demanding. Thus, on days like this I arrive home (after battling the sometimes interminably long commute) and am exhausted and a bit cranky. I am grateful then that as I sit here now exhaling and reflecting on the day I acknowledge that it was in fact a decent day.

Yesterday I wrote that I am in fact living out my life purpose, and I am. My “job,” the place that I go to for eight hours per day, five days per week is not necessarily where I fully live out my purpose, though a chunk of my time I am. People are a primary focus for my life purpose and much of what I do at my job is to work toward the wellbeing of a segment of people. Sometimes the bureaucracy and political machinations involved in any given workplace is enough to make one crazy. You expend energy doing your job and additionally expend a whole lot more managing the background noise and external environmental factors that happen over the course of a given day, week, or month. It can be downright exhausting. Nevertheless, I am grateful for having the opportunity to engage in important work–occasional drama notwithstanding–with mostly good people.

Mama said there’ll be days like this. Or as James Taylor sings in, “Everybody Has the Blues,” “Everybody got some days that they can’t explain…” So I take days like this one with a grain of salt, understanding that this too will pass and before I know it, it will be tomorrow. I remain grateful for the many blessings that are present in my life this and every day: my children, my siblings, all my family and friends perched as always at the top of my list of all for which I am most grateful. These things remain with me throughout the course of a given day, and I find myself experiencing quiet bursts of gratitude when I am least expecting it. May they continue to rain down on me, particularly during the more difficult moments over the course of a day (like the 100 minute commute…)

I will end by offering the night time prayer from the New Zealand Prayer Book (1989) that I share periodically. I particularly resonate with the sentiment, “What has been done has been done; what has not been done has not been done…let it be…”