Tonight I will stare down the blinking cursor of pain known as writer’s block. My intent, as it is each night, is to write something meaningful. Sometimes I am more successful than others, but I do my best. I am grateful for those who read–both daily readers who’ve been here since the beginning, as well as those who check it out because it popped up on their Facebook feeds just as I was posting. “What the heck,” you seem to say and click on the link to the blog and read it. It probably only takes about five minutes to read it; I don’t know for sure, I’ve never timed it. I can’t imagine it takes that long to read, even allowing for the momentary pause over a concept that gave you a bit of an ah ha while reading. Every once in a while someone will comment on the Facebook page or the blog itself, or just “like” it. Either way it’s gratifying, and I am often surprised who at any given day is reading it.
Today I was talking to a friend about serendipity–well, we didn’t use that word but spoke about the concept of the universe aligning to provide what is needed when it is needed. He was telling me about how things were working out for him in his life at the moment.
“It sounds like things are aligning just right for you.” I told him. “It’s like the automatic doors at the grocery store or airport, when you walk toward them they open. It appears you’re walking in the right direction and all those doors keep sliding open for you.”He asked me if things were also aligning for me and I replied that my doors are all opening internally, that I am coming to important understandings about myself, my place in the world, and internal things. My hope is that eventually the internal work might translate into more doors opening externally to guide and direct me toward my what’s next; but at the moment I live as best I can in the present and not too far ahead into the future. I am learning, as has been written, to be content with where I am in this moment and not expend a lot of energy clamoring to be somewhere else in some imagined future. I want to be able to hold lightly to the “good” things I want to attract into and have present in my life, and be willing to stand firm in the face of the “bad” things, the scary occurrences that can happen. In other words, not cling too desperately to try to hold onto the things I love and not try to push away those things that are “bad.” While I can’t say I’m very good at this yet, it’s a goal I’m working toward. The other day I described being stuck in traffic on the way in to work, knowing that I was going to be late for a meeting. I try not to be late to most things, especially a relatively important meeting during which I was to give a report. As I realized that the accidents on my preferred route were going to require me to take a longer, unfamiliar one, I started talking to myself, preparing contingencies in case I arrived late. There was a time in my life when I would have panicked, been distressed by the traffic, frustrated by the gridlock, all the while knowing the clock was ticking. Time is too slow for those who wait…But I have been gradually moving to a new level of understanding about what things are important and worth getting anxious about and which are not. If I were in my car headed to the bedside of a loved one who was dying, then the delays and slow traffic would have been barely tolerable. But freaking out about potentially being late for the meeting seems almost ridiculous by comparison. In the end, I made it to the meeting, gave my seven-minute report and went on with the rest of my day. I am grateful for the realizations I am coming to these days. Learning to put things into perspective has been a powerful tool for maintaining my sense of equanimity and balance even when things get a little out of kilter. In any given situation there is a “best possible outcome” as well as a variety of worsts. When I ponder the worst possible outcomes of a given situation, it takes away some of the power that the situation might have for me. Because generally speaking, the WPO is not as bad as many things I’ve already experienced in my life or could imagine. Perspective is key. I still have a lot to learn and more internal shifts are happening every day that continue to open my awareness and align me with the direction the Universe wants to take me. In the scheme of things being late for a meeting is not that big a deal when the Universe has plans. I’m looking forward to seeing and participating in the great unfolding as it happens.
