Ah, Friday. While I’m not sure how we got here already–the week blew by in a cyclonic blur–but am grateful nonetheless to have arrived at at the weekend. I decided to spin the wheel on this last night before Day 800. It’s always an adventure spinning the wheel; fun to read some of the older posts and see what I was thinking and feeling in the midst of the drama and trauma that was my life. The old folks say, “Wouldn’t take nothing for my journey,” that no matter how tough life has been at various points, overall it’s a good life.
Anyway, tonight’s reprint was originally posted in March of 2012. It made me smile when I read the part about how I’d adjusted from “commuting” in Michigan to what “real” traffic jams in California. Now the traffic jams in California look wonderful compared to the unfathomable gridlock that is traffic on the I495 Beltway from Virginia into Maryland. I guess it goes to prove that with traffic, like most things, it is all relative. Anyway, enjoy this post from Day 245.
These days it feels like I spend half my life in my car, running here and there only to get there and turn around and come back here. Back and forth and back and forth and…well, you get the idea. Until I moved to California most of the places I’ve lived have been either suburban or rural. I laugh heartily now at what I used to consider being “stuck in traffic” back then, and I find myself thinking longingly of my “commute” that on a really bad day took about 30 minutes. These days it takes me 30 minutes to get half way to where I’m going, and occasionally it takes nearly an hour to get from my house to where I’m currently working in Oakland. I just got home a little while ago from picking my daughter up from the San Francisco airport–32 miles (one way) and sometimes an eternity (time wise) from my house. I’ve made this trip for four straight weeks as Michal visited the various universities in her search for the right graduate program. With all this driving, much of which has been done in horrible monsoonal rains, I am truly grateful for three things: first, traveling mercies–someone is watching out for me with all this driving in inclement weather; second, that I have a safe, reliable source of transportation; and third, that I belong to an audiobook club and have entertained myself for many hours listening to science fiction and fantasy novels and, when I need a change of pace, Buddhist teachings by Jack Kornfield and Pema Chodron.
I am grateful for a number of simple things this evening. First of all, in spite of the really nasty travel conditions it created, I really am grateful for the rain. It was an unseasonably dry winter and we have hovered around 40 percent of our normal rainfall. While the current storminess won’t make that gap up in a significant way, every little bit helps. We’re due for at least a few more days of rain as another front passes through and though I don’t relish a rainy commute, if I take my time and rely on the traveling mercies I’ll get where I’m going safely and without incident. The plant and animal life that depend on the rain are no doubt rejoicing and the greening of the hills around the area is always so beautiful at this time of year.
I also remain grateful for the friends who grace my life. This morning I had breakfast with my friend Mary, which we try to do at least once per week. My friendship with Mary, like that I have with my friend Roland are two important local lifelines that help keep me relatively sane and emotionally afloat. It’s not so much that I wail and gnash my teeth to them and they pat my hand and say “There, there” a lot. It’s the exchange of thoughts and ideas, stories and lessons learned, experiences and reflections that make these relationships so meaningful. And when I do share some of my challenges with them, I am met with love, encouragement, and support and I know without doubt that I am in their thoughts and prayers and they are in mine. I knew these were good friends and wonderful human beings before all of my life drama ensued;now I am thoroughly convinced . I am grateful to them for who they are and what they add to my life. And while I know that I am a good friend to them as well, I look forward to sharing lighter, easier days with them when I feel like I give as much as I take.
I am grateful for those places where I can and do give. Today was my volunteering day at the Berkeley Food Pantry, and though the rain dampened our regular numbers (we served the fewest people since I started working there last June), the crew was there enthusiastically present as they always are. They remain fine examples of people serving their community with kindness, compassion and humor. As I’ve said before, I should be so lucky to find a workplace that has the level of enthusiasm, camaraderie, and genuine appreciation for one another as I see in my coworkers at the pantry. It’s a pretty high bar, but I have faith that it’s possible to find or at least help co-create it.
And now, the day is done. I am fortunate to be able to go to sleep warm and dry, safe and protected, free and healthy. Before I rest my head tonight, I will pray for those who are not so fortunate. May they be free from suffering and the causes of suffering and may they know happiness and the root of happiness. So may we all.
