Lessons in Gratitude Day 189

It’s a quiet night or perhaps it’s simply that I’m feeling quiet. Today’s work at the Berkeley Food Pantry was tiring. Though the number of clients we served was about average, I lifted and hauled a lot of relatively heavy items and the bags we distributed to the people were heavy. Heavy bags is a good thing–it means we are providing more and different varieties of food to our clients. I love the heavy bags. I love hauling them out of the back room to waiting clients and sometimes hauling them out to the peoples’ cars if they can’t carry them. Don’t get me wrong, I groan each time I lift the two or three bags we hand to each client, but I wouldn’t trade it. I can’t fully describe all the reasons I am glad to be volunteering at the Pantry. It goes beyond feeling good about myself for volunteering and the idea of doing something good for people. Perhaps it is a roundabout way of dealing with my own life situation–working at the Pantry is one place in my life where I know exactly what I’m doing, where I am confident that the work that I’m doing is valued and appreciated. In a time when much of life has been uncertain for me, I am grateful to have a place to be and a purpose to fulfill every Wednesday afternoon. Now all I have to do is figure out my purpose for the other six days of the week.

I am grateful once again tonight for all the basics that support my physical needs. I have a roof over my head and a place to sleep that is safe, warm and comfortable. I have food available to me and the means to prepare and share it with my son. I am able to find ways to provide a home for my son and assistance here and there for my daughter while she’s at college. It’s not as much as I used to be able to do and will be able to do again, but for now I am grateful to be able to do what I can. I am exceedingly grateful for safe and reliable transportation that helps me get Jared to work and me to the pantry and other places I need to get to. I do not take this for granted. I am deeply thankful for those elements in my life that support my emotional, spiritual, and intellectual needs. This includes the many wonderful people in my life: family–my children and siblings, close friends, spiritual teachers and guides. I draw strength from them in various ways, including the ways in which I am able to give to as well as receive from them. I am lifted up and inspired by the natural beauty that surrounds me; I rarely fail to notice and appreciate the views I have of sparkling bay waters from the top of the street where I live. So many things to be grateful for.

Tonight I will be grateful to take my rest and hope to sleep well, per my new year’s intention. So far it’s been hit or miss, but I am optimistic. Khalil Gibran says, “Wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving.”  I’m not looking to wake at dawn (though many days find me doing just that), but I like the idea of the winged heart and the giving of thanks. It’s definitely worth aiming toward. So be it!