Lessons in Gratitude Day 841

Posted on November 1, 2013 by mtchamblee

Tonight I am so tired I am going to spin the wheel and the first blog that comes up is what I’m posting. Of course I say that now, but if the first blog that comes up isn’t very good or it’s one I’ve posted before I’m going to do something different. Fortunately for us all, it was a pretty good one. So please enjoy this posting from June 2012:

Okay,the wind has totally gone out of my sails. My energy level is squat and I’ve a blog to write. Thank goodness I have gratitude. Because I can always find something to say about gratitude,right?

On days like today I am grateful for every moment I have on this planet with the people I love. Yes, every moment, even the ones when I want to throttle the people I love. We receive constant reminders that we ought to (ought: a word I don’t use very often) treasure the people in our lives who are most important to us. I received yet another today when I learned that a former student of mine had lost a grandparent near the end of May and a few weeks later a sibling was killed in an accident. I cannot imagine what it is like for people when they lose multiple members of their family in a short period of time. Losing my mother 17 years ago was a deeply significant experience to me. I cannot imagine if I’d had to face another loss of that magnitude around the same time. I have been fortunate that my dearest family and friends are for the most part still here on the planet with me, though I still feel the impact the loss of my Dad two years ago.

I have two children, two older sisters, two older brothers and a younger sister. I treasure each of them. I don’t talk to my siblings nearly often enough, and I often lament that I live so far away from that I’m lucky to see them once per year. Still, I think of them nearly every day, pray for them often and try to reach out to them using various means as often as I can. Social networking and technology makes that a lot easier than it used to be: I Skype with one of my brothers every couple of weeks or so, swap quick comments and chat with some of my family on Facebook (and many of my nieces and nephews,which is really cool), and exchange text messages with various sibs at various times. All of that feels like too little:  sometimes and I find myself thinking about how I can make contact more often–not to ask for anything (which I feel like I’ve done too much of over the past year)–but to connect and check in and find out how things are going with and for them.

I’ve always been sort of a family-centric kind of person, and though time and distance have sometimes thwarted my interests in remaining in as close contact with my siblings as I’d like, I haven’t quite given up on making that happen. Meanwhile, I am grateful to have my daughter here for several weeks in between finishing up her undergraduate degree and heading for graduate school at the end of July. Although we haven’t maximized the experience–having her, my son and me again under one roof–I am hoping that we create a few more opportunities to spend some time together doing fun and goofy things as well as having some meaningful family discussions about what we’re going to be doing next and where. My daughter has a pretty good handle on this already, but her input will still be valuable as we each think through what where we’re going to be by the end of the year.

Tomorrow is definitely not promised to any of us; we have only this moment…until the next moment,and perhaps a whole bunch of moments. In this moment, I choose to tell my daughter (who is sitting here in the room with me) that I love her and that I’m grateful for her being here. And heck, even though I’ll be picking up my son from work in an hour, I think I’ll text him now and tell him I love him too. (He’ll probably text back that he loves me too, even if he wonders what the heck has gotten into me!) I want them to know how much I love them and tell them as often as I can remember; and to remind myself of that, even when I’m angry at them. I am more grateful to have them in my life than I am about just about anything else. I look forward to continuing to find ways to show as well as tell the people I love just how important they are to me.

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Lessons in Gratitude Day 840

Posted on October 31, 2013 by mtchamblee

In October of 1994 I was at home in South Bend visiting my parents. I can’t really remember for what occasion I was there, but I was flying solo away from spouse and children.  My mother was supposed to go out on this particular Saturday evening with the mother of my sister in law. They were going to see a play at an old theater downtown. She asked me if I would drop them off at the play and pick them up later so that she wouldn’t have to worry about parking. Always glad to do things for my mother, I agreed. When we showed up at Annie’s house to pick her up she came to the door dressed in her bathrobe and hair up in rollers.

“Oh Dorothy,” she said, somewhat aghast, “I didn’t realize that was tonight. I thought it was tomorrow.”
“It’s no problem, Annie,” Mother replied. “We’ll catch another one together. I’ll go on tonight.”
As we turned from the door and headed back to the car, my mother looked at me and said “Well you might as well go with me then.” I looked down at myself taking in somewhat raggedy attire: an old pair of jeans, hiking boots, and a beat up fleece-lined, blue jean jacket. I was not dressed to go to the theater.
“Oh come on, it’ll be fun.” She nudged me and we were off.
The play was supposed to be a comedy, and while I found it mildly amusing, it wasn’t very good. But what I did enjoy thoroughly was watching my mother watching the play. I distinctly remember sitting there looking at her and thinking, It is good for me to be here. I am glad that I came.

Two months later my mother was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer and five months after that she was dead. For years I kept the ticket stub to the play in my wallet; I carried it with me everywhere, periodically pulling it out and looking at it. Somehow as I watched my mother watch the play a part of me knew it was a special moment, one of those that you photograph in your mind as being really important even though you don’t know why. I am grateful for that memory, now some 19 years later. It is still very real to me. This blog tonight is in honor of the Dia de los Muertos, the Day of the Dead. And tonight I honor my parents, and all those who have gone before us.

I don’t pretend to know much about all of the various traditions associated with October 31st and November 1st. I can remember as a child when I went to Catholic school dressing up as a saint for Halloween and then celebrating All Saints Day and All Souls Day around about November 1st and 2nd. But what I do want to think about is those whom I have lost and who I miss, who have gone before me. Always my parents are at the top of that list, but this year I want to also add my Aunt Jeanne, one of my mother’s sister whom I lost this past July. Aunt Jeanne and I were close in many ways, from the time I was a very young child. I l feel her loss all the more keenly this year when I’ve spent so much time trying to reconstruct my family history; with her death, I lost the last living link that I have to information about my mother about her grandmother and her parents. There is no one alive now whom I know that can answer any of the many questions I have about her side of the family.

I am grateful for my ancestors and the opportunity to celebrate their lives. I know that in some traditions on Dia de los Muertos you are supposed to build an altar and offer on it the favorite foods and drink of the persons who have died. Three years ago after my father’s death I didn’t prepare his favorite food, I simply put a framed photo of him up on the mantle, lit a candle next to it, and poured and set a glass of whisky next to it. Dad drank scotch, but it was the best I could do. This year I will not be building any altars for Aunt Jeanne or for Dad and Mom, but I will be holding them in my heart with love and gratitude for who they each were in my life and all they did to make the world a better place. And I am grateful for the memory that came dashing back today as I was driving to work, remembering the unexpected blessing of the trip to the theater with my mother. There are many such memories in my lifetime with her and with Dad, but this is the one that is sticking with me this evening, and for each precious memory of all those whom I have loved and no longer walk the world in the flesh, I am extremely grateful.

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Lessons in Gratitude Day 839

Posted on October 30, 2013 by mtchamblee

Tonight I am still pondering the concept of forgiveness. I want to circle back around to two important concepts prompted by comments people made in response to yesterday’s blog.

Point #1: Forgiveness is a much about the person doing the forgiving as it is about the one who is being forgiven. In an earlier blog about forgiveness, I wrote, “Forgiveness to me much more favors the person doing the forgiving than the forgiven. It is in my own best interest to practice forgiveness. That’s not why I practice, but it offers a definite benefit.” At least some of the people whom I have forgiven don’t even know that I’ve forgiven them; they are usually people who hurt me and didn’t realize it, or it happened so long ago that perhaps they have moved on or forgotten about the injury. When I pray for them and extend forgiveness to them, it releases us both–it moves me closer toward continued healing from the injury and at some level it releases them. In that sense, forgiveness is an energetic exchange between parties: I send the intention, the prayer, the blessing of forgiveness out into the universe and whether the recipient knows I’ve forgiven them or not, that intention, goodwill flows out to them. I can’t speak for how they experience it, but I take it on faith that it happens. And when I have had the opportunity to directly offer forgiveness to the person and they have been able to receive it, we have each the been better for it.

Point #2: You can only ask for forgiveness, but if someone chooses not to forgive you there’s nothing you can do about that. A person can earnestly apologize, ask for forgiveness for something they’ve done wrong or have been perceived as having done wrong. “I’m sorry for what I said. I’m sorry for what I did. I’m sorry for what I didn’t do. I don’t even know what I did or what happened, but I’m sorry to have hurt you. Please forgive me.” People will have a variety of reactions to our apologies, including doubting the sincerity of them. If they choose not to believe you or accept them and extend forgiveness, there is little we can do to make it better.

“It is much harder,” my friend commented, “to venture to ask for forgiveness, sometimes repeatedly, and not get it.” My response to them is “Stop it.” Stop asking. In my opinion, you get to a point where you are no longer asking for forgiveness but are begging someone for something they’ve shown themselves to be unwilling or unable to give. When we chase after something it becomes remarkably elusive; the more we run after it the faster it runs away. Forgiveness is a bit like that, the more we harangue the person we’re apologizing to the less likely they are to respond favorably. When you sincerely apologize, seeking the person’s pardon, then it is a relief when that pardon is extended. But if it is not, you nonetheless have to let go of the need to be forgiven and, as best you can, let it go.

All of this forgiveness business doesn’t stand alone. From my perspective it is sprinkled liberally with prayer, good will, love, and positive intention. Everything begins the the intention. “I am so very sorry,” is my acknowledgment that I recognize that I did something to hurt you and I regret it. “Please forgive me,” asks something of the other person: Please see my acknowledgment  and regret of causing pain, know that I didn’t intend it, and give me an opportunity to do it differently next time. Take your time. Each person plays a part in this dance, and it’s important to remember that forgiveness is not an event, it is a process. It’s not a “one and done” proposition; it’s an ongoing, continual practice. And through it all, whether you are one seeking forgiveness or the one offering it, be patient and kind as best you can, offering it all in the same spirit as you would offer a prayer. Simply put, do the best you can. And in the midst of the seeking and offering, do so with a generous and grateful heart.

“The quality of mercy is not strained.
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath. It is twice blessed:
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes.”
~William Shakespeare

If you substitute “mercy” for forgiveness you have the general idea: forgiveness blesses the giver and the receiver. And so it is.

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Lesson in Gratitude Day 838

Posted on October 29, 2013 by mtchamblee
“I’ve been tryin’ to get down to the Heart of the Matter/But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter/But I think it’s about forgiveness…”
~Don Henley (India.Arie)

What is a the heart of the matter? How often I have run across situations in which the simple, but challenging answer was forgiveness. I think a lot about forgiveness; it seems like every time I turn around I am offering forgiveness or asking for it. I think one of the greatest gifts we can give another person is to forgive them, to release them from responsibility for some perceived hurt or slight they have perhaps caused me. There have been people in my life to whom I continue to extend forgiveness even though they are many years removed from my life. Occasionally I’ll bump into a painful memory–something will touch a nerve that I’d thought had healed–and I have the opportunity to forgive all over again. Wait, didn’t I already forgive them for it? Yes, and now I have a new opportunity to forgive them for it again at a newer, deeper level. So as the song says, “I’m thinking about forgiveness.”

Tonight I was talking to a friend about a thorny situation in which I have been asked to intervene. “How come I am the one who has to step into this?” I asked her and she calmly replied, in essence, “Because that’s who you are, that’s what you do.” One can hardly argue when it’s put back to you in those terms. The problem, in part involving some very old, longstanding issues between the parties involved, could be resolved with plain old basic forgiveness–the willingness of each party to offer and receive forgiveness.

I’ve heard people say, “You can’t expect me to forgive and forget.” to which I want to respond, “Okay, so don’t forget. But forgiveness is non-negotiable.” I have spent my entire life forgiving and letting go about things I sometimes wish I could forget. The older and stronger the pain, the deeper the wounding, the more likely I am to remember, even if I’ve forgiven repeatedly. So no, I don’t necessarily expect forgetting, but my hope and expectation is that I can continue to exercise the muscle of forgiveness. I keep going back to the question Jesus was asked by one of his disciples, “How many times must I forgive my brother? Seven times?” (Sometimes I wondered about the basic level of emotional intelligence of some of these men…) Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.” That’s a pretty high standard to uphold, but it’s the expectation.

It is not easy: forgiveness requires hard work. As I said at the beginning, it’s quite simple and very difficult to do. And yet it is among the greatest work I believe we can do, both for the people we forgive and definitely for ourselves. It is in our own self interest to let go of whatever it is we’re holding onto and carrying and release it. In the process we are healed and we release and heal others as well. Now if only I can convince the people who need convincing that forgiveness would be in their self interest then the world will be a better place with one less pocket of strife and insecurity in the world, not to mention how much better each of them will feel.

I am grateful for the gift of forgiveness. I have been on the receiving end many times and am much better for it, and having been forgiven it makes it easier for me to turn and forgive others as I can refer to how it’s been done for me. Seventy times seven, hmm? Well, I reckon I’d better get back to it.

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Lessons in Gratitude Day 837

Posted on October 28, 2013 by mtchamblee

I am grateful to be working someplace where even when I encounter challenges I am still grateful. Okay, so maybe that sentence doesn’t quite make sense. Let me try it again. In past workplaces I have encountered challenge after challenge, like surf pounding the shore with no let up. I remember the first time I saw the Pacific Ocean–first in California and later in Australia–and I was impressed by the height and power of the waves. I hadn’t seen the like in my encounters with the Atlantic, so I was pretty impressed. Anyway, I have worked in institutions where the problems or the resistance or the difficulties were fairly relentless, almost nonstop. I’d just get my bearings from one pounding, would just regain my feet, only to get knocked down again. My current workplace, while in many ways as challenging as others have been is different. I feel like I can catch my breath between bouts of drama, and in fact there are long stretches of placid sea during which real work can be done and positive changes made. Imagine that.

I am grateful to be working someplace where I can use some of the skills that God gave me, and while I’ve struggled mightily at times to make sense of and navigate the particular culture of my work setting, for the most part I am discovering the lay of the land enough to know how to avoid the shoals and underwater icebergs that could bust a big hole right in the side of my boat. And while I’m far from having it all worked out, I’m not sailing as blind as I once was.

I was having a conversation with a colleague the other day about some developments in her organization that was giving her real pause; that  some of what was happening was so troubling she had to work really hard to focus on her tasks and not look at what was going on in the overall organization. “I guess all we really can do is show up every day and do the best we possibly can and help as many people as we possibly can.” I said to her. We wondered aloud, though, at what point can one no longer ignore what’s happening in the larger organization; when do you know that you can no longer maintain your integrity and remain working there? I’m not sure we arrived at a good answer, but it definitely caused us to stop and think for a few moments about what was important.

I went for nearly 19 months without a regular, full-time job. I had my share of difficulties and being without a consistent source of income was among the more challenging experiences of my recent life. But I also know what it is like to work in a toxic environment where every day you spend their drains a little more life from you and demands from you more of your integrity and honesty than you can afford to expend. In that situation, you have to make a decision to move on while your spirit and soul are still intact and trust that the Universe/God won’t let you fall. It requires a lot of faith to do that, but the alternative–to stay in an unhealthy environment–requires and even stronger level of fortitude.

I am grateful that where I am right now and the enterprise in which I am engaged has not yet required of me that I compromise any of my values and the integrity that I try to embody across the various areas of my life. On the contrary, I find that I can bring more of my whole self to the work I am doing now than I have been able to in recent years. I have learned from painful experience that if your values are out of alignment with those of the people with/for whom you work, the Universe is more than capable of seeing that you exit from the situation, one way or another. I’ve found that to be true in other areas of my life, not just the workplace.  I am still seeking clarity about what my “life purpose” for this time truly is and if my current work is allowing me to live it out; but at this moment my work is closely enough aligned that I am settled. And for that degree of steadiness I am sincerely grateful.

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Lessons in Gratitude Day 836

Posted on October 27, 2013 by mtchamblee

It has been a good, relatively productive day. I began the day with one of my typical Sunday morning rituals: going to the grocery store. As odd as it sounds, going grocery shopping is  often a mildly emotional experience. Over the years as I’ve analyzed this phenomenon I recognize that the sadness is connected to memories of my mother. I frequently went shopping with her, helping haul around the second cart that we invariably needed to provide enough groceries for our family. It was one of a number of activities I associate with time spent with my mother, and though she has been gone 18 years I still feel the twinge of sadness during my biweekly trip to the supermarket.

Years later I would take my daughter shopping with me, and while we almost never needed a second cart, we managed to pile up the one, barricading canned goods and other items behind stacked up boxes of cereal. The trips with Michal were equal parts sweetness and annoyance as we engaged in frequent negotiations over which of her favorite sweet, snacky foods we would add to the cart. Even during our most recent shopping trip my  was still asking how many “chits”  or markers she had to spend to ensure she got her favorite foods. These days my grocery shopping trips continue to have a certain melancholic feel to them as now I am shopping by myself for myself and my cart is rarely more than a third full. In spite of the tinge of blues, I nonetheless am grateful that I have the wherewithal to purchase groceries.

I’ve been through some days when I could only afford a few items in my cart and at times depended on food from the pantry where I volunteered for over a year. I have never been close to starving, but I have on occasion experienced hunger. I do not take for granted the availability of food or the ability to pay for it. It is why I continue to support food banks and pantries everywhere I have lived.

The rest of my day saw me engaging in activities that reflect the steady march through autumn toward winter: I purchased Halloween candy, raked up my first batch of leaves, brought my sweaters and cold weather clothes down from the attic and moved my spring and summer clothes out. I’ve refilled the bird feeder twice since I put it up two weeks ago, some of the migratory birds loading up on energy to begin their flight south for the winter. The nip in the air the past few days serves as another reminder. I am grateful to have spent the early part of the day accomplishing a number of things I needed to in order to prepare for the coming week. Tonight I am finishing this blog a couple of hours earlier than usual, allowing me some time to read and wind down before I take my rest.

I want to close, as I sometimes do, with the night time prayer that I’ve quoted many times before in the two-plus years I’ve been writing this blog. It exemplifies the kind of day I’ve had today: one in which I accomplished some things and, as often happens, left some things unfinished. There is always something else that could be done, and yet I can be satisfied with what I did today. All is well.

God,it is night.
The night is for stillness.
Let us be still in the presence of God.
It is night after a long day.
What has been done has been done;
what has not been done has not been done;
let it be.
The night is quiet.
Let the quietness of your peace enfold us,
all dear to us,and all who have no peace.
The night heralds the dawn.
Let us look expectantly to a new day,
new joys,new possibilities.
In your name we pray. Amen.

New Zealand Prayer Book (1989)

As I go into another week, I want to do so expectantly, looking forward to new possibilities, new joys. And of course, new things to be grateful for.

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Lessons in Gratitude Day 835

Posted on October 26, 2013 by mtchamblee

Today has been a very lazy day and I don’t even feel particularly bad about that. I’ve been really tired and more than once I’ve found myself dozing off for various periods of time. Now that it’s after 8:30 p.m. here on the East coast, I can actually contemplate going to bed, which I am quickly becoming quite serious about. Of course I have a long list of things I should be doing: reading books and articles that I’ve started and have carried around with me for weeks, some of them months. Back and forth I haul them between my bedside table and my backpack, where I carry them to work thinking perhaps I’ll read them at lunch time (if I ever really took a lunch break.) I’m really not sure what to do about this except to keep trying to make microshifts so that I set aside time in my schedule for reading. Today I actually had the nerve to add a new book onto my Kindle which is already loaded with more books than I could read in six months if I started reading and ready daily for several hours. Still, it has important information I need and so I might actually skim it.

Time appears to be quite the elusive creature these days. How is it that there rarely seems to be enough of it? A friend suggested to me that instead of writing this blog daily that perhaps I dedicate the time to doing a different type of writing-perhaps finishing my novel, for example. I briefly toyed with the idea, but in the end I keep coming back to this blog. It reminds me of the little engine that could: this is not a big deal blog with thousands of people reading it each day (I can count my readers in the dozens.) No, it’s not about quantity, the numbers of people who view the page each day, it’s about the quality: some folks, the occasional readers mostly, read and comment that on that particular day it is just what they needed to hear. No, if I need to make more time for myself during the course of a given day, it won’t be taken from blog writing time.

I am grateful this evening for simple blessings that some days I notice more than others. Today I’ve found myself wrapped up in my electric throw blanket keeping myself warm as the nighttime temperatures drop into the low 30s (which will seem warm on those January days when the times get into the teens or single digits.) On cold evenings I think of those people living out on the street, and offer a prayer to them for shelter and warmth. I am grateful and blessed to have both.

I am grateful for friendships and love in my life. Today I enjoyed my monthly Skype call with my friend Roland. It is always wonderful to connect with him, to enjoy the give and take that you have with a friend. Today I learned from him as well as offered him my advice and suggestions on a number of things he is thinking about. It continues to amaze me that God gives me wisdom for everyone else but when it comes to my own issues I can be completely clueless. I think that’s the principle of the thing that keeps us connected with one another. We often have our own answers and retain our own repositories of deep wisdom in our own spirits; but it seems to me that God hides that wisdom from us so that we seek out others who can help us access it.

My thoughts are a bit scattered this evening, my apologies for that. Gratitude remains at the foundation of my life, it is the way I walk through the world. It is why I come to this place each night to share a few thoughts, to encourage others to develop a gratitude practice in whatever form that takes. May we all find places of gratitude, generosity, compassion and lovingkindness as we walk through our days, as we take time for what’s important over the course of a given day. May it be so for us all!

Posted in Friends, Gratitude, Simple Blessings/Gratitude, Time | Leave a comment

Lessons in Gratitude Day 834

Posted on October 25, 2013 by mtchamblee

Sometimes I am baffled by life. I am occasionally baffled by the things I say and do, by the world around me. It has been a very long week in some ways and yet I am amazed (and relieved) that it is Friday again. This week I’ve boggled my own mind with a variety of communication miscues and misunderstandings with a variety of people. I find myself wondering if mercury is in retrograde or something. Whew! I am grateful that this is Friday and I have two days to sort out what’s going on with me and take steps to clarify my situation and develop solutions to address it. That’s a fancy way of saying I’m going to get my act together.

In the meantime I have leaves to rake. Today we had our first hard freeze of the autumn. There was a fine layer of frost coating the grass this morning; another sign of the approaching winter. I think it will be good for me to rake some leaves tomorrow and perhaps get up on the ladder and clean out some of the gutters. Or, I could do what I often do on the weekend after a long, tiring week: nothing. We’ll see how that goes.

So tonight I decided to spin the wheel and see what wisdom the universe has to offer. I often spin the RNG wheel more than once–sometimes I spin it six or seven times if the posts that come up don’t resonate with me. In some ways that means it’s not truly random, it’s selectively random. Tonight I had to choose between two early posts that I enjoyed rereading. So without further delay, tonight’s lesson in gratitude from Day 167 from December 2011. I wrote it about my friend Honor–a good subject indeed, because I am grateful to her for many lessons she’s taught and continues to teach me about friendship and unconditional love. It doesn’t get any better than that.

I could learn a few things from my friend Honor. Like many of us she has her idiosyncrasies and foibles,even some neuroses here and there. But for the most part she is happy, easygoing, and doesn’t let anything get her down for very long. She forgives easily and doesn’t appear to hold grudges. She doesn’t seem to worry about the future or hold onto regrets from the past. She knows how to play and  takes joy in the simplest of pleasures. She puts up with my moods and crankiness and while she does know how to stay out of my way when I exhibit cranky behaviors,she’s always ready to hang out when I invite her to. I am grateful for her presence in my life, and I’m embarrassed to admit that I don’t tell her that very often. I plan to improve on that, starting today.

For those of you who don’t know me well or have just started reading this blog, Honor is my canine companion. Four years ago we brought her home from an animal rescue center. She came to us two months after our much-loved dog, Shiloh died. And while you can’t replace a good friend,you can invite a new friend into your life.

Along with my children,Honor has borne silent witness to the various transitions that have happened in my life over the past seven months in particular. When we moved back in May,she too had to move away from her home and a fellow canine friend. She’s had to adjust to new surroundings that are fairly different from her previous ones. Life is different for her too,but she rolls with whatever is happening in the moment. At times I have felt guilty about her quality of life–perhaps I don’t play with her enough, sometimes I fuss at her too much, etc. But I realize that all things considered she probably has a pretty good life, and from what I can tell she doesn’t complain or lay blame or express discontent in any way. In fact, as I am writing this (way earlier than usual),she is laying in the sun that shines brilliantly my room in the mornings. She finds it and lies down,getting up and moving as it slowly makes it’s way across the front of the house shining in different parts of the room. Life is simple and it is good.

Honor Enjoying the Sun

Honor has things she’s afraid of–she hates going out in the rain to do her business:there’s something scary out there that might get her. We’ve speculated that bad things happened to her before she found her way to the animal shelter. We can only speculate about them,but being outside in the rain somehow factors in there somewhere. She nevertheless manages her fears (sometimes through prodding,cajoling or threatening on my part) and takes care of her business outside. It will no doubt make for a long winter here in the new place (it rains quite a bit in in winter). I had just gotten her “trained”to go out in the rain at the old house and then we moved. But other than that little hiccup she’s settled in and content. Again,a lesson I could learn from her about learning to be content no matter where I am or what’s happening in my life. Note taken. Sigh.

I am grateful to Honor for her presence. With Jared at work a lot,she is my primary company. She is yet another of the many teachers I am encountering as I walk the path. She is an obvious example of how unconditional love might look,and as I outlined at the start of this blog,she has a number of other attributes that I would like to begin embodying. I am grateful for her example to me. When I pray or when I am doing lovingkindness and compassion practice,I often include her specifically (not just during the “all beings”portion of meditation). May she continue to know happiness and the root of happiness. So be it!

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Lessons in Gratitude Day 833

Posted on October 25, 2013 by mtchamblee
“I relied upon the moon and Saint Christopher”
~Mary Chapin Carpenter

I am finally sitting in front of my computer writing my blog on a very chilly October evening. I got home from after 11 p.m. tonight. We hosted an event this evening, and by the time we packed up and hauled everything back to the office it was already late. Then I stood talking with a handful of staff and students for an additional thirty minutes, brainstorming about the next events, making jokes in the midst of more serious conversations. I left when they started talking about some zombie apocalypse series they watch. Yep, time for me to roll.

I like driving on the Beltway after 10 p.m.–I usually breeze home in about 35 minutes. Even though I was tired, I knew I wouldn’t have to compete with the regular after 5 gridlock that I endure most days. Tonight as I was cruising on 495 just before the 270 split, I came around a big curve and there she was, hanging in the sky: a big, beautiful, buttermilk yellow third quarter moon. I love when that happens; it takes my breath away. I am grateful for that. I so love the beauty of the world around me, of the celestial as well as the terrestrial bodies that appear all around me. I love when the moon pops up out of nowhere and is suddenly right there in front of me, silent and beautiful. When I arrived home and stepped out of the car, I looked up into the sky at the pinprick constellations:  Cassiopeia, the big dipper, others. I am in awe as the psalmist was when he wrote,

“When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them?”

It has been a very long, but mostly good day. I am grateful for all that has transpired, the simple as well as the complicated, the exhausting and the exciting, the difficult and the easy. It was a mild ride on Mephistopheles the mechanical bull–nothing dramatic and crazy, whipping this way and that, just a simple toss here and there. I am going to close early so I can get to sleep; I’m half asleep here now as I type. Tonight as I prepare to take my rest I find my heart turning to pray for various people who have popped onto my radar: praying for their healing–physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, for their overall wellbeing, for financial concerns, for someone grieving the loss of a beloved family member. There’s always someone for whom I can be offering prayer. And I know that somewhere in the world, someone is praying for me. And for that I am most definitely grateful.

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Lessons in Gratitude Day 832

Posted on October 24, 2013 by mtchamblee

I am seeing the world a little differently these days, especially since last Friday. I was sitting at a conference with a group of colleagues; we were seated at a round table and were chatting about nothing in particular when a small bug–a fruit fly I’d assumed–buzzed around the left side of my face. I batted absently at it as my colleague continued speaking. It buzzed around in my peripheral vision and I swatted the air again until with a start I realized there wasn’t a fruit fly harassing me, what I was seeing was not outside of me, but coming from inside me. Oh my gosh, I’ve got floaties, I thought to myself, then promptly did what anyone with a smart phone and Wifi access would do: I googled it.

I love Google, I admit it. I had no sooner typed in “black dots floating…” than it filled in the rest “in front of eyes.” I found several articles about “floaters” as they are apparently called, but here’s some of what I learned: they are common (this was a relief), they are generally harmless, and they are with me for the foreseeable future. “Once you develop eye floaters they usually do not go away, though they tend to improve over time,” one article mentioned. Wait, what? As relieved as I’d been to discover that I didn’t have some dread disease, I had not been prepared for this information. My assumption had been that if I got a little more rest or took an additional vitamin or two I’d be right as rain. Not so. And so as I sit here typing this evening, I am viewing the screen and everything around it through a left eye the vision of which is somewhat distorted by a squiggly, filament-like, blackish line.

“Most of the time people learn to live with eye floaters and ignore them. And they often improve over months to years,” the article offered encouragingly. Most of the time? Improving over months? Yikes. I have found, though, that they are right in that I have managed to ignore the fuzzy line bouncing, darting, and swimming through my vision. I guess you really can get used to and learn to live with it. I am grateful that this is in fact a relatively minor malady. I had just said to someone a few days before this anomaly appeared in my vision that I had been blessed to have not suffered any major health/physical illnesses, issues, or setbacks throughout my life–I never broke any bones, suffered any major illness or accident. In that regard I have been very blessed indeed and for the most part have tried not to take this blessing for granted. So even now this matter of the floater in my left eye is relatively minor and my overall good fortune continues.

Most mornings when I offer lovingkindness and wishes of goodwill toward myself and others, I will pray, “may I/we be healthy and strong in body, mind, and spirit” and for the most part, I have been. And for that I remain exceedingly grateful.

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